Human beings are hard wired for connection. HARD WIRED PEOPLE!! We are MADE to CONNECT. And when we feel disconnected, something literally feels off, feels wrong, feels out-of-sorts… And when humans feel out-of-sorts they find creative and unusual ways (read: annoying and inconvenient) of getting what they need.
I love this quote from Brene Brown about connection:
“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.”
This connection piece is HUGE! And sometimes, well meaning, loving parents forget about this and we find ourselves pulling out our hair, wondering why our children are making our lives so difficult.
Well my friends, I would like to invite you to take a deeper, more intentional look at your child(ren)’s sense of connection.
When you consider your current challenges with a child (toddlers to teens), I would like for you to consider taking a “balcony seat” and observe the situation with a bit of perspective. Imagine that you are looking down on the experience.
From this vantage point, ask yourself these questions:
- Am I taking into consideration the experience/perspective of my child?
- Is my response bringing us closer together or farther apart?
- When was the last time I had one on one time with this child?
- Does this child feel felt/understood?
- How can I release the feeling of urgency so that I can connect with the human in front of me?